19d
Why couldn't the bicycle stand upright? It was two tired.
  18d
Eggs don't like jokes because they're so afraid of cracking up.
  17d
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom? The P is silent.
  17d
I had a neck brace fitted years ago and I've never looked back since
  16d
Mummies never take time off, they're to afraid to unwind.
  16d
Don't trust atoms, they make up everything.
  15d
They’ve just found a gene for shyness. They would have found it earlier, but it was hiding behind a couple of other genes.
  14d
How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
  14d
I'm so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.
  13d
What is blue but so far less heavy? Light blue.
  13d
My wife told me I had to stop acting like a flamingo. So I put my foot down.
  13d
I saw a robbery at the Apple Store does that make me an iWitness?
  12d
I just got hit in the head with a soda.Thankfully it was a soft drink.
  12d
This seafood restaurant is so bad I pulled a mussel.
  11d
I don't know many things about Sweeden, but the flag is a big plus.
  11d
I tell dad jokes but I have no kids. I'm a faux pa.
  10d
My buddy is pretty good with math but he's terrified of negative numbers. He stops at nothing to avoid them.
  10d
Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
  9d
I just heard about the actor that fell through the floor boards. Glad to hear it was just a stage.
  9d
  8d
Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere...
  8d
Three conspiracy theorists walk into a bar. You can't just tell me that's a coincidence.
  5d
  1d
A can opener that doesn't work is now a can't opener.
  13h
There are three kinds of people in this world. Those who can count and those who can’t.
  2h
For what does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo drizzle.